Elena Taber: Forever Lost in the Matrix @Elena Taber

Watch on YouTube · 2024-10-30 · 26 min

0:00 Hi everyone, I'm going to be reviewing a video called For anyone feeling lost in their 20s, watch this video. Alright, it seems like she's a girl who's lost, obviously. Which is why she travels around a lot, trying to find her purpose in life. That's what I get from the first few seconds. Maybe I'm wrong.

0:40 She has a quarter-life crisis in her 20s because you're only supposed to live to the age of 100. That's why it's the quarter of your life.

[video] 0:50 Okay, hear me out. We've all heard about the midlife crisis. Think of that, like, 45-year-old guy who needs to buy, like, a sports car. Of course, Julia Robertson, eat, pray, love. But what about the quarter-life crisis?

1:06 Yes, Eat, Pray, Love, as far as I remember, was about a woman who's lost, who doesn't have children. And that's of course why she was lost in life. She has no purpose in her life. She didn't do what she's naturally supposed to do. Of course you feel lost.

[video] 1:25 Okay, maybe more of like a third life crisis. But quarter life crisis sounds better. So we're going with that. So for any of you guys out there in your 20s and early 30s wondering where the hell am I going? And what am I supposed to do? I'm right there with you. Turns out this is actually...

1:42 You're supposed to do what you're naturally supposed to do as a man or a woman, it doesn't matter. Simply as a human being. There's nothing else that you're supposed to do. If you do anything else besides what you're naturally supposed to do, then you will feel lost and depressed, which is the case here.

[video] 1:59 Actually, a whole damn thing. There's a Wikipedia article on it that describes this phenomenon as a crisis involving anxiety over the direction and quality of one's life experienced in a period ranging from early 20s to their mid-30s. This has been so real lately. I wake up in the morning with kind of a sense of dread. It's really hard getting out of bed. I'm constantly asking myself, what am I supposed to be doing? Who are my people? What's my purpose?

2:22 As I said, you only have your natural purpose. In nature, you have children at a natural age. In her case, I don't know how old she is exactly, she should already have at least five children, probably more. And in the morning, you would wake up with your children around you. They would greet you, they would make you happy, as long as, of course, you're already biochemically healthy. Of course, you can't be eating bread, drinking coffee, eating vegetables and some overcooked meat. thinking that you're gonna be happy just because you have children, of course, it doesn't work that way. Obviously, you also need to eat naturally, which means that you need to be eating raw meat, drinking blood, eating organs, everything that humans eat in nature, what you can see in nature documentaries, and all of that.

3:15 That's why you can also see that these people always express joy or at the very least they are content with life. You can see the happiness in their eyes already, just because you can see how their brain actually is through the eyes. And you can see the feeling of being lost and depressed, sad, everything in her eyes.

3:45 There is no so-called purpose. She isn't following her natural senses. She is not doing what she's supposed to.

[video] 3:53 That's good, because then it's probably not stressful, or at least not as stressful as 99% of jobs.

4:14 Good start.

[video] 4:15 ...or career stability. And every time I go to any family gathering, people are like, so what are you going to do next? Which can be very discouraging and lead to a lot of anxiety and existential questions.

4:28 No, that's good. Nothing wrong with it. There's also a lot of families on YouTube who simply make videos. That's how they make a living. Do you think that any of them want to have a stupid career? Or go to a job in the morning? Or do they rather just vlog their life of sitting at home doing whatever going outside? What's better? Everybody would choose that kind of a life.

[video] 4:52 And I think on top of that and not really being sure of where you want to live or who you want to build a life with, it can get really overwhelming. Personally, I felt like there's been this kind of like dark cloud hanging over me for honestly the past year, if not more.

5:08 That's your biochemical state. It's the state that you're in. You don't know how to get out of it. You don't even know how you got into it. And that's why you can't also, of course, get out of it.

[video] 5:23 So this is what brings me here today. No, I'm not the only one asking these questions and feeling this uncertainty. And I really wanna try to find the good amidst all of this. I do think it's an opportunity to really reflect upon choices you've made so far. The question is basically, do you wanna stay on the path you're currently going down or is it maybe time for a pivot?

5:43 She cleans her kitchen, she reads books on her balcony trying to find a meaning in man-made symbols, some opinions and beliefs written by other people, maybe some romantic stories, maybe more likely the case while sitting in New York, a city full of slaves of lost and depressed people.

[video] 6:09 We're going way back to the very start of the book. I was born in Paris and my parents moved to suburban Southern California. And it's here that I really started dreaming of a bigger life. I felt just a bit stifled by the classic American suburban experience. I was also a pretty shy, reserved kid, like stated on Fridays doing homework. So I really dreamt about the life that would come once I moved out and moved on and dreamt of it being filled with big cities and travel and events and concerts.

6:31 Yeah, very typical nowadays. People are manipulated into moving away from their parents, even though in nature you always stay with your parents. Then, of course, you also feel lost because your loved ones are gone, but you're just pressured into going away from your parents by your peers. And then, of course, you have these dreams because of the media to go to some big city, to get a career, whatever you learned. usually from Hollywood movies, and then of course you do that, you live in New York City or whatever city, and then you realize that it's not what you actually wanted. Actually, it was a lot better back home in your small town with your parents, but you have this pressure, you need to be away from them, but having children at the age of 20 is also wrong, which is why you need to do something else.

7:29 You're not supposed to have children, but you also can't be with your family. Well, then who do you have who actually really loves you and who you can love? Nobody. Then you have some one-night stands maybe with some guy. There's tons in New York City. Then you're 30, still childless, you're not with your family anymore. You're already kind of removed from them because you haven't been with them for so long. You just video call them sometimes, if even that.

8:01 And you just drift away from the ones you love and the ones that love you more and more. Up until you're in your mid-30s, maybe 40, and you realize, wow, I just wasted my life. I'm not really attractive anymore. Hardly any guy wants to be with me. The guys that I find attractive don't want to be with me anymore, obviously. I didn't connect with anybody. I'm gone from my actual family. What do I have now? Nothing. Now I will get a few cats and dogs. Maybe my career will take off eventually. That's what will make me happy. They always have to get to the point of their 40s, 50s to realize that it was all a waste. And it seems like nothing can make them understand it earlier.

[video] 8:47 And there was the college chapter. This is where I kind of began to break out of my shell. I had like a full like...

8:56 Exactly, exactly. In college you go to concerts, parties, whatever. You completely waste your life, destroy yourself biochemically, consume alcohol and whatnot, hook up with some guys, all meaningless. Then because you have the body count, men are not that interested in you anymore. Maybe you liked some guy, but he wasn't really into you. Now you're kind of developing this hatred against men. It will just get worse and worse over the years.

[video] 9:29 A punk moment.

[video] 9:33 I then decided to move to Paris on my own when I was 18 to be an au pair, which was very pivotal for me in really finding my own voice. After that, I transferred to the college. I would graduate from San Diego.

9:44 Au pair also, such a typical life.

9:48 Almost all of the women of today live the same lives. Oh my god.

[video] 9:54 I really fell in love with nature and the ocean and built these really deep friendships that I felt.

10:01 You didn't fall in love with nature, otherwise you would have done what you're naturally supposed to. I get what she means, but it's actually not true.

[video] 10:08 Like, I really belonged in.

[video] 10:12 And then once again, I was like, it's time for something completely different. So then came New York.

10:17 Yes, it's time for something different because it's not satisfying. It's not giving you what you naturally need. The way you should look at this kind of a lifestyle is the same as losing an arm. And I'm really not overreacting. Of course, losing an arm would be more apparent, obviously. But as far as not having something that you naturally need, it's the same. You go through life not doing or having what you naturally need. You feel like something is missing. And whatever you do, it's just not giving you what you actually naturally want. Until you actually get the arm back. Okay, that's a bad example because you can't actually get it back. But what I mean is that this feeling of not having what you naturally need,

11:10 not having an actual part of you is really the same, because when you naturally don't have or don't follow the desires or whatever that you actually need or want, then you just cannot feel whole. It's the same as not having a body part. And when you don't have children and don't eat what you're naturally supposed to eat, You will feel biochemically sick and unhappy. It has to be like that. There just isn't a way around nature. You can't go to any cities, do any sports, join any groups of people, do any careers. That will fulfill this void. It's impossible. There's nothing that anybody will ever be able to do to get around this. And this is what she doesn't get. And that's why she's going through all of this and that's why she still feels lost. Because she still hasn't gotten her arm back, so to speak.

12:08 Completely on her own, yeah. How can you feel good then? It just feels horrible.

12:22 Two and a half year relationship, a relationship that failed, whatever happened. That can also, of course, make you feel lost. You lost somebody that you, let's just assume, loved or at least liked in some way.

[video] 12:42 yeah typical travels there's been the chapters of feeling lonely and finding friends and really growing so much further in myself also at the same time i feel like i've been really stagnant in the last year or two All these chapters have obviously led me to where I am today. I'm going on year five in New York, which I honestly feel like such a super senior. I'm obviously so grateful I've made some really good friends here, like I'm healthy, my work is relatively stable. And yet despite this, I find myself so anxious all the time. For one, kind of the monotony.

13:09 Anxiety is probably caused by food, realistically. It's your nerves being affected. That can be anything. Tea, coffee, it can even be exercise, of course. Grains, any seeds you consume, any vegetables. It's a long list. Realistically, she probably eats a garbage diet.

[video] 13:30 I'm feeling like I'm pretending being adult, but also having no clue what's to come or what I should be doing to get there.

13:40 You don't need to plan anything if that's what you're implying. In nature you maybe plan for the day if you're hunting, not even really, because you hunt in the moment, even that is done in the moment. But for sure you do not plan years ahead or whatever the slaves of today do. It's just impossible, you never would. Because you live in the moment, because you only have this moment right now in nature. In slavery, you have your career, you're saving up money which doesn't exist for a house, for a new car. It's just absolute nonsense, none of which matters.

[video] 14:30 Was that her family? Quite a lot of children for today's standards. Is she now gone from all of her family members? In nature, you always stay together with your family, as I said. They should all be together.

14:56 That sucks. Oh my god, and then she's lifting the dumbbells or whatever up and down. Oh my god, I don't know. So lost. Just so wrong.

[video] 15:17 For me, it's important to be somewhere where I really feel and creatively inspired. I know I want to use creativity for good.

15:24 I know I deeply... Yeah, yeah, photography. I even used to do that in my early 20s because I also was basically lost in the sense that I didn't know what you're supposed to do. Of course, we all know deep down, but...

15:42 It's just a very severe brainwashing around us.

[video] 15:45 I value my freedom and I love being my own boss. I love being the master of my own schedule and time. I know I love being surrounded by people I love and community. And I'm used to change.

15:57 Right, which would be your family in nature.

[video] 16:00 I think I actually really learned to thrive in it. I feel really energized when I'm in a new environment. I always want to be growing and evolving and Trying to become a better person. So if you're...

16:12 Growing, evolving, trying to be a better so-called person, which means slave, by the way. Don't use the word person. Or personality, or police, policies, politics. It all comes from the same word. Oh my god.

[video] 16:32 Feeling similar this season, I guess my main encouragement would be try stopping for a second and zooming out. Check in with yourself, your values and priorities, and assess whether it's time for a kind of pivot. Maybe your values are the same from a few years ago, or maybe they're totally different, and that's why you're feeling a disconnect. Maybe also you're nowhere near where you

16:51 You're disconnected from your body, your true self, your ego. You probably believe that we should drop our egos or experience ego death, go on a spiritual tour.

17:09 I wouldn't be surprised. That's exactly the problem here. That's why you believe that you're growing and evolving. Because you believe that humans...

17:23 can learn and become better people and our morals will evolve or whatever. When in reality, you're just a natural being. You're programmed naturally to do what you're supposed to do. And that's all that can make you happy and healthy. And you're going completely against it. And that's why you feel lost. It's the only explanation and you know that it's right.

[video] 17:53 You thought you'd be by now and that's okay. Nobody has it figured out. And hopefully you can just uncover a bit more.

17:59 People in nature have it figured out. More of who you are in that process.

[video] 18:06 And while there is a lot of this lack of clarity and direction, I'm like, why not? Why don't we take advantage of this freedom and kind of step into the unknown? Definitely feel like I'm facing that question right now. Like maybe it's time for that next chapter.

18:19 So now I want to talk a little bit about... Yeah, maybe a new hobby, why not start drawing, maybe move to a different city, oh yeah, or travel to some other places, meet some other people, have another relationship where you protect yourself against having children for two and a half years, even though your body is literally screaming for you to reproduce, which is literally the purpose of intercourse.

[video] 18:47 what I'm personally going to be doing about this. Maybe this is classic escapism speaking, but what if I forced myself to face uncertainty and isolation that could truly challenge my sense of self and the way I view work and relationships in the future.

19:03 There you could see I think that she drinks coffee. It's confirmed. Obviously if you live in New York. I'm kind of joking, but still.

[video] 19:13 So I've done a small-scale version of this by moving from California to New York, and it was beautiful and terrifying and so challenging. And so I find myself now feeling like I'm ready for another chapter, and what if I took it up a notch? So six months ago, I started an application for a long-term talent visa in France, and after months and months, I finally got my passport back in the mail, and now it has this cute little visa in it. Just got this in the mail. Oh, I'm gonna be emotional.

19:41 Oh my god, I can move to France, a new country. Maybe new goals that I can set for my life, new values that I can learn. That's what will fulfill this void of being childless and being biochemically sick because of my horrible unnatural diet. Of course, the French people. Maybe I just had a baguette deficiency.

[video] 20:09 I'm Paris Bound. So, why France? Big reason is I really want to work on my French.

20:16 I've studied on and off since... To be fair, Paris is my favorite city. Not that I care about cities as such, but it is pretty nice. Okay, you don't have to say it. I get how it is there nowadays. I've been there like over 10 times. I lived there for a while also.

[video] 20:34 High school, I think it's really beautiful to have a goal for yourself that's completely self-motivated. And I'm really curious about how living in Paris could help reorient some of my cultural habits and priorities as not just an American, but particularly a New Yorker. The times I visited there, I find myself so inspired to slow down and to reorient my own values. And I know this all probably...

20:54 Yeah, all of these parks and the way the city was created. As far as man-made buildings and everything goes, it is one of the best, but at this point you can forget about it if you know what's going on there.

[video] 21:07 It sounds a little dreamy and a touch naive, and I'm very aware of the loneliness and the struggles that come along with this. But for me it's that thing that I've always said I wanted to do, so I figured if not now, then when? Now, I know moving to a foreign country is not an option for most people, but I really believe that there are so many ways to induce novelty or new challenges into your life, wherever you may be, that can help you kind of work your way through the weird intricacies of this quarter life crisis. Maybe it's starting your own business, quitting a job, asking if you can be remote.

21:34 Yeah, exactly. Starting a new business, new career, whatever, yeah, hobbies, whatever. It's just exactly what you're not supposed to do.

[video] 21:42 Or doing that thing you've always wanted to try, but you've always been a little too scared to do. I'm starting off with just a couple months at a time, subletting my New York apartment and renting in Paris. But I've got my working visa, which makes me finally a resident of France.

[video] 21:56 Hello. Hello from Paris. I made it. I'm staying here at my friend Damon's apartment for the next couple months. And... Of course, changing cities like this isn't going to fix...

22:06 It's literally what I said. A new city. Oh my god, man.

[video] 22:12 All my problems and all the things we've discussed. But it's already such a good chance to really challenge myself. And I feel myself being shut outside my comfort zone and forced to kind of reconstruct the

22:23 That's bad, because you should always stay in your comfort zone. Your comfort zone is exactly where your body wants to be. It's when everything feels right. Right is good for your body, it means that you're doing well, you're in a good place. If you feel uncomfortable, you're laying on a bed with needles in the mattress, then you're doing something wrong, it feels bad for you.

22:52 Going against your comfort zone is the worst thing that you can do.

[video] 22:56 With which I go about and see my day-to-day life. Even in just my short time, like I said, it is lonely. Like there are highs and lows and there are pros and cons that come with shaking up your life. But I'm still glad I'm here and I'm trying something different to kind of grow through my quarter-life crisis. So I hope you also enjoyed this video. I kind of was trying out a different filming and editing style.

23:14 It's really funny that she did end up moving to a different city in the end. Just like I said, instead of listening to herself, we can assume that, just like most people on Earth, she is intimate with the other gender, which means that she wants to reproduce. Whether she's conscious of it or not, that's the purpose of it. Of course it feels good, that's why Every animal wants to do it, but the end product is children. That's why it's called reproducing. You are producing another life and this life would be there to love you. You would love this life and that gives you a lot of purpose. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that everybody on Earth should be having children.

24:06 The way things are going, most people on Earth should probably not be having children just because of their biochemical state. If they are not happy and healthy, they cannot produce and create happy and healthy children. She should firstly start eating natural food, as I said before, a lot of organs, raw meat, blood and so on, what humans eat in nature. ideally raw animal foods and fruits, whatever you want. And then she would want to have children even more. She would have an even stronger drive and she would be happy and healthy enough to actually take care of the children.

24:49 Obviously, it's probably not gonna happen. She's probably never gonna see this video and even if she will, then she will not listen to me, but I mostly make these videos for other people. Maybe some people who watch her videos or some people who randomly find my videos. A lot of people say that they simply find my videos because they were watching some guy and then I reviewed the video feeds and they found it intriguing what I was saying. Eating raw animal foods, what? Wait, children? Wait, actually deep down always wanted to have children. And so on. All of that stuff, what you naturally want. It is for sure absolutely 100% clear that this is the void in her life. This is the emptiness, that's why she feels lost.

25:41 There's no mystery here. Everybody who is not blind right away can see what's going on here. Now she moved to France. Then she will move back to the US or some other place. And it will go on like that until the drive maybe becomes too strong in her mid-30s or 40s. But most often it's too late because either no guy wants you anymore or Some guy who you won't really want. Or you will be infertile just because of your lifestyle.

26:23 Thanks for watching.