Reviewing Bryan Johnson's TikTok Videos @Bryan Johnson

Watch on YouTube · 2026-01-10 · 29 min

0:00 hey guys i have reviewed a lot of videos by brian johnson but i never reviewed any of his tiktok videos that's what i'll be doing today hi friends it's me again the healthiest man alive i want you to we can only hope that he's joking pause what you're doing and look at yourself do you look like this does your back hurt is your neck sore

[video] 0:27 It's because your f***ing posture is terrible and you need to fix it right now.

[video] 0:33 Now, imagine a string starting at the top of your head, running down through your spine. A little magic man comes and, pop, pulls you right up.

0:44 Your posture won't magically become bad or good. If you use your phone a lot and you look downwards, then you may get neck pain and your posture may suffer because of what you do. But the kind of posture which he showed at the beginning of the video will be caused by your body deteriorating. Your body will fall apart, so to speak. And that's because of unnatural food, for the most part.

[video] 1:17 That tickles, magic man. It's supposed to. Good posture. Now, breathe. That's it, friends. You're doing it. Doesn't that feel nice?

1:40 His videos are good, they are well edited, but his message is wrong. He has a good editing team.

[video] 1:49 Now, if you must continue Doom Scroll, then you can do it with good posture. Why? Better blood flow, improved breathing, less neck and back pain, and improved joint mobility. Also, you will look sweet with your badass posture. Trust me. Just trust him.

2:09 he will experience the same problems if he doesn't change his diet and he will essentially be forced to do it eventually when he will realize that it's not working

2:25 You can look all around you. People who eat unnatural food, seeds, especially vegetables. Most people's diets are based on seeds. They sort of fall apart when they get older. You see this all around you.

2:51 He punches away the junk food but he eats even worse food. Junk food is bad for you because the meals are based on seeds and oftentimes they are cooked in seed oils. He eats whole seeds, manmade poisonous vegetables without the meat and dairy. How is that better? It's way worse. That's why he looks sicker than people who eat junk food.

3:23 And now he's about to punch away phone in bed. But at the same time, he attaches himself to all of these machines, which are supposed to make him healthy.

3:39 Then using a phone in comparison is way better.

3:45 Nicotine. Okay.

3:50 Death. Yes. Sure, man.

[video] 3:54 Alright, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna touch this. Are you f***ing kidding me? This is passing food? Let's break down the big...

4:00 Yes, but the funny part is that it's healthier than what you eat. Just because there is meat inside.

[video] 4:08 580 calories, 11 grams of saturated fat, that's half of your daily value. 1060 milligrams of sodium, also almost half of your daily value. 45 grams of carbohydrates, 85 grams of cholesterol, and 7 grams of added sugar, which is almost as much as a glazed donut. First, it will give you an extreme sugar and insulin spike. Then 90 minutes later, you're going to feel hangry and craving more. That patty's a piece of sh**. Look at this. McDonald's brags about 100% pure all-beef patties, but 100% beef is not that simple. Beef that comes from lot-fed industrial cattle have different fat profiles, meaning less omega-3 and more omega-6, which fuels inflammation. But Brian, what about the pickles? I wouldn't do it.

4:40 He's talking about something which cannot actually scientifically be measured. No doubt that meat from those kind of places is worse for you. That's common sense. But you cannot use that as an argument.

[video] 4:58 Even the emulsifying agents they use in the pickles will disrupt your microbiome, which can trigger chronic inflammation and disease.

5:05 They have... That may all be true, but it's still better than what you eat. People on a junk food diet would still last way longer than Brian on his current diet.

[video] 5:22 skillfully used science to create an addictive food in my opinion my opinion in my opinion McDonald's is a deaf machine the most addictive substance in the US isn't illegal and it's sold to kids a recent study found that kids who are raised on junk food exhibited comparable addiction rates to drugs and alcohol ultra processed foods became and it's great that he makes people aware of all of this but

5:49 He's simply not a good role model. His diet is a lot worse.

[video] 5:56 Prevalent in the US food supply in the 70s and 80s. As a result, kids who grew up in that era, now aged 50 to 64, show nearly double the addiction rates of their peers who are now aged 65 to 80. In this study, addiction was defined by the same criteria used in substance dependence. This includes intense cravings, withdrawal symptoms, inability to cut down, loss of control, and

6:17 Yes, and as I've said many times before, they do use chemicals in these so-called foods, which are officially considered to be drugs. They make you addicted to what you're eating. And because you're never satiated, seeing as it's unnatural food, you will want to eat it again and again. Super bad for you, but it's coming from a guy who's eating even worse. That's the joke.

[video] 6:47 Yes, once you start eating raw meat, organs especially, and if you drink blood

7:14 Will you ever want to drink a soda if you have had blood? Never. Just literally never in your life again. Because all that you will think about is blood, blood, blood. But if you never had it and you instead buy some red rings, red bull and whatnot... then of course you will be addicted to that, you will be miserable, you will slowly deteriorate, you will become ill, because you're not eating what you're supposed to. It's as simple as that. Once you switch to eating naturally, you clean your body, you actually detox, and then you won't want it again.

7:58 I know that everybody always uses these words, cleaning your body, detoxing, but that's really the way you should see it, because when you eat junk food, the chemical store in your body, what you ate, of course, will be in your body, obviously, in your fat, seeing as it is what you eat.

[video] 8:17 Age of 50 may face similar, if not more pronounced levels of addiction. But again, he shows a burger, which is bad for you, with a lot of meat. Really just implying that the meat is bad for you.

8:40 That's typically how it is, and the cheese, when that's actually the best part of those meals, and that's exactly why somebody who eats junk food would last way longer than Brian Johnson. Really bad junk food would be fries made in seed oils. That's really, really bad for you.

[video] 9:05 cycle i believe in you if you have balls this message is for you if you know somebody who has balls this message is also for you i discovered something really important after doing a hundred sessions of sauna there was scientific evidence that heat negatively impacts one's fertility so as the first part

9:22 Heat impacts your whole body and who knows how exactly it impacts women when it comes to fertility. But my point is that it's generally bad for you. You shouldn't only focus on your fertility because you shouldn't expose yourself to extreme cold or heat at all, ever. Nobody does that. It goes against your intuition.

[video] 9:50 I tested by having ice on my balls for 21 sessions of sauna. What happened? All of my fertility markers improved. In fact, the best markers have achieved.

9:58 Yes, but you don't want to be in the heat. You hate it. Everybody hates the sauna. some people will say that they don't but then when you look at what they do it's because they live in finland it's super cold now in january and then of course they will say that they like it because they come back home a lot of people there have saunas in their homes It's super cold outside, it's snowing, there's a storm, and then they go into the sauna. Yes, to warm up, because you hate the cold, but not because you generally like the heat, the sweating. And my point is simply that if you use the ice pack on your balls, then you're preventing possibly one part of the problem of being exposed to heat. But it's generally bad for you.

10:58 You generally don't like it. It's generally going to be unhealthy. It's just stupid to do that. To focus on one part of your body when your whole body hates it.

[video] 11:10 In years. Then we changed the experiment to remove the ice so there's no ice on the balls. And guess what happened? Devastating consequences. Wiped out 50% of my fertility markers. Absolute disaster. I wondered if I would forever be infertile. the answer is no because if you begin icing now the body will take 68 to 72 days and rebuild i got my results back this week and my trend is now starting to point up so i'm on the rebound the starter pack to ice your balls is i wear cotton underwear and cotton shorts then for the ice pack i use a bpa free toxic free reusable pack you just slip it in over the underwear between the shorts this is an easy win i'm gonna call it don't die spur hold that thought i'm gonna call you back

11:44 when you realize the protocol is working. He used to be somewhat overweight, he was never healthy, but now he's as sick as never before. What exactly is working?

12:08 Here's a clip from Vegan's The Epitome of Malnourishment 9. Go check it out in case you haven't. And as we can see in 2021, when he was 43 years old, he looked all right.

12:26 And then when he started the Blueprint protocol, we can see what happened.

12:38 Really bad dark eye circles, eye bags.

12:51 Is this a healthy human being? Is the protocol working?

13:02 Come on. Stop this nonsense.

13:31 His videos are well edited, but the message is usually wrong. In this case, he tells people to sleep, but for 7 hours? Why 7? There may be somebody out there who listens to him, who believes that exercising is healthy, and they will want to sleep for 8, 9, maybe 10 hours, depending on how much they exhaust themselves. But somebody like that may believe that they should set an alarm at 6 AM and go to bed at 11, sleep 7 hours, just because he says that. Meaning that even this message is wrong.

14:15 No, you should simply sleep as long as you want to, always. It's just dumb to recommend people to sleep for seven hours.

[video] 14:23 Isn't this just amazing? Oh no. Wow, that is... That is the...

14:32 He never left the house without pants, but he worked outside. What people don't understand about these kind of cases is that, firstly, the skin doesn't age. You simply damage it. And the reason you damage it, and this is the second point, is because... You wear a cap, you wear clothes, of course, but the arms are exposed, meaning that if you would be naturally in the sun with your whole body, you would right away notice when you are overheating, when you have been in the sun for too long, you would have a red face, you would right away feel the sunburn. It's impossible for this to happen if you go out into the sun with your whole body, but if you work outside and everything else is covered up except for your hands, then this may happen.

15:32 But the overall point is that this is not aging. It's the same as having a cut on your arm. Would that age you? Would you have a shorter lifespan because of the cut? No. It's simply damage. Damage won't aid you unless it's really severe damage, obviously. In this case, it's very clear what happened here. That's why you have this contrast.

[video] 16:03 Yeah, it's good for you, but you always walk around with an umbrella and you look very pale. Pale to the point where people call you ill for a good reason.

16:09 Hm?

16:25 That's the thing. It's not aging. Damage is not aging. It's simply your body skin being exposed to the sun for an unnatural amount of time.

16:40 You would easily, as I said, notice it if you would simply sunbathe. That couldn't possibly happen.

[video] 16:48 I go out into the sun at noon when it's as strong as it can be. That's when I sunbathe.

[video] 17:15 and UVB protection, try to avoid the chemical-based sunscreens. Please don't burn. It's not worth the risks.

17:22 Yes, exactly. I agree. But as I said, naturally, it's not even possible to burn because you right away know when you have had too much and when you cover yourself up, especially the head with a cap, hat, a sun hat, you will simply not notice what's going on.

17:53 oral health your breath will usually stink if your gut is unhealthy it will come from the inside if you have a food stuck between your teeth then of course your breath will also stink that's more so a problem for modern people because there's less space between the teeth I've never seen any animals, humans in nature, taking care of their oral health. If something really gets stuck, then they would get it out, but other than that... I haven't seen anything. Because there's no need for it. If you eat modern garbage food, then it's understandable.

[video] 18:43 Today I'm going to walk through what you can do to improve how your breath smells. Every morning when I wake up, I waterpick my mouth, then I floss, then I brush, and then I do a tongue scraper. I'll do that again midday after lunch. I'll do it again in the evening, so three times per day. Sometimes I'll use a very diluted tea tree oil as a mouthwash. Clinical studies show it dramatically reduces plaque and inflammation. Now that you have these basic...

19:01 For the most part, you're trying to cover up the symptom when you do this. You're not actually solving the problem.

[video] 19:09 Oral health practices a few other tips for you. One is sugar is really corrosive to oral health. Try to limit your sugar intake as much as possible. Two, and we know this, check up with the dentist.

19:21 He's talking about white sugar, which has been proven to be toxic. It has an LD 50 value, but that's because of how it's created. Sugar from normal fruits isn't going to do that. Acidic fruits would do that, but that's understandable.

[video] 19:43 Every six months. Next, you want to be mindful of acidic drinks. So if you drink coffee, great. Try to have it in a relatively abbreviated period of time instead of sipping it over a long time. The acidic nature of that drink softens the enamel in your teeth and can wear it down. And also wait about 30 to 45 minutes after eating because after you've eaten, the enamel in your teeth is soft. And if you brush, it can degrade that. Oral health does not come from luck, but you may get lucky if you have good oral health. These are my ladies.

20:06 This is exactly what I meant before.

20:16 Red light panels, but he avoids the sun. Nothing that he does makes any sense. He really believes that he will become healthy and live a long life because of these machines. because of unnatural machines. He goes against nature and believes that he will succeed. It will be the biggest downfall because he really believes that he's high up and in reality he's at the bottom already. He just doesn't realize it yet.

[video] 20:53 It's a long story. Shaniqua, Helga, this kitty, Genie. I dream of Teresa.

[video] 21:03 Hi, friends. It's me again, the healthiest person in the solar system. Sometimes people read headlines and they assume that what I do is not accessible. To them, I scream, you couldn't be fucking wrong. The exact opposite is true. You could achieve similar health benefits if you create some simple life habits. Count them with me, bitches. Number one, sleep is the world's best longevity drug. Build your life around sleep, but everything in your life will become so much easier. Next, nutrition. Throw that f***ing hotdog out of your life!

21:35 But the hotdog would be healthier than what you eat.

[video] 21:41 And eat some whole foods!

21:44 Yes, okay, whole foods. What kind of conclusion is that? Throw away the hot dog, which is processed meat? Yes, it's garbage. Still better than what he eats, as I said. But then the conclusion should be eat whole meat, as in whole animals. Not whatever he has there. Some fruits or what?

[video] 22:09 You just don't look healthy. I can never take you seriously. It's just not possible.

22:21 Oh, checkmate.

[video] 22:22 Woo-hoo-hoo! Exercise, daily, walking... Daily.

22:27 Walking is not exercise by any definition of the word. Walking is normal, natural. Exercise has to be unnatural. Stretching, any... That's all right. It depends on what he means by stretching. Not over-the-top stretching.

[video] 22:44 Just get off that ass, get off that ass. Just, just, just, just get off that ass.

22:50 Doesn't make any sense if you force yourself to do something all the time and you never rest. You will simply age very quickly.

23:05 Again, the videos are well edited, but the message is horrible.

[video] 23:11 Finally, stop the bad stuff! Smoking, drinking, scrolling until your brain rocks! Help. Me. There you go. Five habits. Write them down. Tell me in the comments below which ones you've mastered. Until next time, my immortal nieces and nephews.

[video] 23:54 Kate and I met, I believe, around five years ago. We got into a relationship three years ago.

24:04 I heard about this. I hope that she's not using him for his money.

24:11 He is quite a lot older. As horrible as the information is which he promotes, I don't wish that upon him. We've been working on it since.

[video] 24:21 Can you give me a wink? I guess I can model out in my mind what I think the reactions will be. There will be joy, there will be mocking, there will be hate. There's going to be a little bit of everything, but by sharing this with others, it could be a good influence in others who are either looking for or working on their own relationship.

24:41 When I was growing up, I would try to- He is taller than her. They are a looks match. It's really just the age difference.

[video] 24:51 I find marriages that I wanted to emulate and they were hard to come by. Good relationships are really rare and... Kate is important to me because she really does feel like my other half. She feels like self. And, you know, when she hurts, I hurt. When I feel joy, she feels joy. Do we need to go to the rental place counter? No. Is it an R? No.

25:19 No. I for sure believe him that he loves her. You can just tell.

25:27 Who knows how she feels?

[video] 25:32 The cool thing about our relationship is we don't have any expectations of each other and we really value our conscious experience. We don't want to waste it in a misaligned relationship or in something that's not producing joy.

[video] 25:50 so much of our lives are shared with each other and i've been adrift looking for deep companionship it's taken me basically my entire adult life to find this hi brian hi

[video] 26:13 and so for those of you who also have a vision for deep companionship i would say keep at it it may take longer than you think but it's really not worth settling and if you're in a relationship already and you're not feeling that deep commitment I would commit to try to make it so that you can invest and can mature a relationship so you both get the deep joy that they offer. So it's worth hard work. It's worth the persistence that's required. And a lot of people are very quick to pull the eject button. And I think that it's worth the hard work to build these relationships. I just say keep on going and do the hard work.

27:05 Ah, the last video was sweet. Still, Brian Johnson is one of the worst people online, and his project Blueprint has destroyed the lives of thousands of people at the very least. He cannot even get sleep, right? He tells people to sleep for seven hours instead of telling them to sleep as long as they want to. But that's because of his overall problem. He lives counterintuitively. He goes against his own nature. And that's why he suffers. He eats unnatural food instead of eating what he really wants to eat. Meat.

27:53 He takes synthetic laboratory-made chemicals which have been proven to be toxic in experiments. They have an LD50 value.

28:06 He exercises every day simply because he was told to, not because he wants to. If you want to live a long and healthy life, then you need to completely listen to your intuition and do what feels right. And what feels right is what is natural for you. This is not going to end well. You would not exhaust yourself, exercise. You would be eating meat and if you have access to blood, then you would drink it. You would not take any pills, which taste horrible. That's why you swallow them quickly. They taste horrible because they are toxic. I hope that that's needless to say. And as I said, you would sleep as long as you want to.

29:07 You would be in the sun and you would go out of the sunlight when you had enough. You would simply do what you want to do because that's what's healthy. That's what's right for you. And that's what promotes longevity.

29:30 He's going exactly against it, but he expects to live a long life. Thanks for watching.